“My prostate is asymmetrical.”
“Mine is too.”
“What does it mean?”
“It doesn’t mean anything.”
Yeah well this fucking movie doesn’t either.
I don’t like all of Cronenberg’s films but the one’s I love have one thing in common, a fucking story. This is one of those films which everybody says “PAY ATTENTION OR YOU WON’T GET IT!” First off, I paid attention. Second, you don’t really need to. Third, pay attention in this film equals “TRY NOT TO DOZE OFF MOTHERFUCKER!”
The three best scenes in this film are of course, the sex scenes, most notably Pattison’s prostate exam. Hawt. And Juliette Binoche slithering around post-fuck……….. SHEEEEEIT, goddamn ball-draining.
Pattison is a fucking star and the whole reason this film gets any rating outta me whatsoever. Seriously, he’s damn good. I couldn’t see the original choice Colin Farrell playing this guy, he’s too old.
Oh, Sarah Gadon. Yeah I don’t know….if she wanted to play a character whose head I’d like to punt 60 yards, mission accomplished I guess.
The film is just a ponderous fucking thing. About halfway through I started thinking “If one of the AIBN guys was here with me, we’d probably be drunk right now.” And the last 20 minutes with Paul Giamatti….BWAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! Jesus Christ every time one of them put a gun in their mouth I was like, “Man I wish that was me.”
So in summary fuck this movie.
2 out of 5